Thursday, November 15, 2007

Don't Test Me, Baby

Hi Husband:

I've been noticing an upsetting trend on the social scene, and I thought I should let you know about it (I am sure it doesn't apply to you).

As you know, there is a dating ritual that involves asking for someone's phone number, should you find yourself interested in a certain someone. Now, I know technology is advancing at a rapid pace (some of us remember a time before mobile phones), and it is hard to keep tabs on when to use what device, and in what fashion (hello, phones vibrate). So, keeping this veritable mine field of inappropriateness in mind, I am not quick to judge technology offenders, however, as I said, a trend has emerged that must be checked.

Here's the deal: "Boy" flirts with me on any given Friday night. Fine. I am as loyal to you as a laborador puppy, but a girl must flirt. And because I am lovely (all my girlfriends say so), Boy asks for my telephone number. I may or may not be interested, but I am polite, and I give Boy a phone number (heavy emphasis on "a"). Herein lies the problem: Boy tests the phone number. He actually puts it in his phone and presses send!!

Husband, this is so uncool. Here's why: if in fact I have fudged, making the last 7 an 8, I am really doing us both a favor by not rejecting Boy openly and to his face. He makes us both look bad by testing the phone number I have given. And, by testing it, if I have given the right number, he is certain to instantly join my screen list.

So, Husband, spread the word with all your iphone carrying friends: I don't care if you can create a new republic in the South Pacific with the touch of a button, don't test me.


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